About your Search

20120501
20120531
Search Results 0 to 11 of about 12 (some duplicates have been removed)
obama because his policy is the basis of obama care. >> the next president of the united states, president mitt romney! captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! >> stephen: thank you, ladies and gentlemen. chors plaus. >> stephen: thank you so much. welcome to the report. thank you for joining us. folks, i don't know about you, i don't know about you, folks, but i for one-- (cheers and applause) >> stephen: i am really-- reeling from the presidential elections first may-tober surprise. yesterday's shocking announcement. >> today i'm suspending the campaign. >> stephen: newt gingrich has left the race! i have not been this caught off guard since he entered the race. (laughter) >> stephen: now newt pledged to endorse mitt romney at a later date. but mitt's campaign might think newt said enough already. >> romney is a guy who will manage the decay. he's not the guy
is not available in the united states so to provide american men with birth control that painfully injects poison into your taint, prescott is proud to introduce a stylish thong containing a live scorpion. (laughter) simply slip scorpotricycline on and let it get to work on your junk. plus, it's completely reversible in that the underwear is reversible. the scorpion poison in your testicles is permanent. side effects of scorpotricylin include stress falls, deviated rectum and arachnuts. that's it for cheating death brought to you by prescott pharmaceuticals. keep all boats away from the laboratories, you have been warned. until next time, i'll see you in hell. (cheers and applause) [ train whistle blows ] [ ball hitting paddle ] ♪ riding to work, with my best friend pete ♪ ♪ pete, pete, pete ♪ riding to work with my best friend pete ♪ ♪ riding to work with me [ orbit trumpet ] don't let food hang around. clean it up with orbit! ahh. [ orbit glint ] ow...ow...ow. fabulous! for a good clean feeling after any meal. ♪ eat, drink, chew orbit! (cheers and applause) >> stephen: welcome bac
of representatives. >> he has run for president of the united states. >> he has run for just about everything. >> and his name is-- what is his name. >> i don't know it is josu, if it is hosu. >> hosu or also known as joshua. >> i have always called him mr. la rose. >> stephen: well, ayla rose by any other name spells like a mystery. join me tonight as i go in search of the man who would ride my pac tails. >> it's a mystery. he's got a lot of super pacs. but we don't know anything about him. who is this guy? to solve the mystery of the missing money man. >> i hopped on board "the colbert report" seaplane. and flew to duval county, florida, where mr. la rose ran for office. to meet the supervisor of elections and find out just who this la rose really is. >> i have never met him or seen him. >> oakey doke. >> my search then took me to the county la rose lives in where i met with former rival for the state senate and current clutter phobe bill ramos who remembers la rose from their dramatic clashes in the primary debate. >> when the first debate occurred, he wasn't there. and the second one, he
kept screwing around in class. mr. mills, i'm about to high five the president of the united states. captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org >> stephen: tonight how much do we tell our kids about is sexuality? that's enough. (laughter) then a new convenience for gun owners, i hope you'll stop shooting long enough to hear about it. and my guest actress diane keaton is here. la dee da, la dee da. the new york yankees have their own cologne. it's made from the most expensive ingredients of all the competing colognes. this is "the colbert report." captioning sponsored by comedy central (cheers and applause) >> stephen: thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen. welcome to the report. good to see you here. (cheers and applause) >> stephen: welcome to the report, everybody. good to you have with us, please, nation. folks, -- >> stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! >> stephen: okay, folks. (cheers and applause) >> stephen: thank you, ladies and gentlemen. you make me so happy. will you make m
Search Results 0 to 11 of about 12 (some duplicates have been removed)

Terms of Use (31 Dec 2014)